I'm going back to Penal Substitution. Here's one of the reasons why. One of the reasons I have come back to Christ is because of C.S. Lewis and his ideas about beauty. For Lewis there seems to be an instinct for the transcendent that is awakened by beauty. Beauty stirs a longing for the transcendent. This seems to be true in my life. I have had intense experiences with what I consider to be "beauty". So intense that it felt like I was in God's presence. It just seemed like something was telling me that there has got to be more to it than just this finite existence. Here's one of those experiences that I recorded:
In the presence of Beauty I find the gentleness of mystical love. It is here that wonder is awakened and the beauties of humility, compassion, and kindness come alive. Within this matrix my fears melt away. I tremble at the thought of being inside this glowing radiance, for the longing of my heart is for a union with Beauty. To drink it in and become one with it. For me, Beauty brings warmth. Something in my soul longs for this delight, for Beauty inspires and delights my soul. When Beauty whispers Her tenderness to my soul I am filled with a childlike wonder and awe.
This is one of the things Christ was doing at the cross. He was removing God's wrath from my vision so that I could see and savor Divine Beauty in His own face. At the cross I was united to Christ in a mystical union. My sins were extrinsically transferred to the innocent Christ as God's wrath was poured out and Christ removed God's wrath from my vision as He died and was resurrected and then the righteousness of Christ was extrinsically transferred over to me. That is, I have died to the old self as it was crucified with Christ and clothed myself in the robes of Christ's righteousness as I am risen to new life. I am one with Christ in mystical union with Him. There is now no condemnation for me. For all that has been removed by Christ as I am in Him and He is in me. Death has been overcome. I can now experience the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.